“Peace I leave with you, my peace I give unto you: not as the world giveth, give I unto you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.” John 14: 26-27
It’s been a week and a day since we laid Julia to her rest. I miss her so much!!! But never have I felt so loved and cared for. Everyone”s concern and love has been amazing. God’s love is evident in the love we receive from other’s. And we have deeply felt that. I know your prayer’s have sustained us and have given us peace at this time. Thank you!!!
Morning of Feb. 26th, Julia’s burial day
We had a viewing and a grave side service for Julia on February 26th. We had a beautiful morning covered in snow, that reminded me of Julia”s purity and innocence. It was so wonderful to have so many friends and family show up for the viewing and grave side burial. We’ve been touched by emails, blog postings, comments on face book, cards, calls, texts etc. The kindness and generosity has been amazing. I suppose you don’t realize how many friends you have till something tragic happens in your life. I feel like George Bailey in the movie It’s a Wonderful life. Our Bishop conducted the Grave side Burial. We sang Families can be together forever, our Bishop spoke and our four daughter’s gave thoughts on Julia and then Bill dedicated Julia’s grave.
Bill’s sister Kate had twin boys that were born at 22 weeks about 15 years ago that were buried at the cemetery we chose for Julia. We asked the cemetery if there was a spot near her cousins. And amazingly there was a spot right next to them, and that is where we buried her. It was a little easier knowing that we got to lay her next to her cousins.
I was very nervous when Bill and I went to dress her for the viewing. I was scared that I wouldn’t be able to let go of her and lay her to her rest. But when we saw her she looked so different. Julia wasn’t there, her spirit was truly separated from her body, and I was okay with letting her go. I know that she will always be mine, and I can always keep her with me in my heart. And I wouldn’t be surprised to know that she watches over us, maybe even now as I think of her. It was a beautiful, peaceful sad day.
I’m not exactly sure why this tragedy has happened to us. I don’t blame or hate anyone because it has happened. For whatever reason Julia only needed a short stay here on earth. What an amazing spirit she must be. I’m actually grateful for the way things all happened. I think the duration of the six weeks prepared me for her passing. I am confident and without regret for all that we did for Julia. She had to go when she did. And in the end I am so glad that she finally made the call herself. What a little fighter she was. Julia’s yeast infection is what got her in the end. The doctor’s tried every anti-fungal medication that they knew of, even the adult ones, but nothing would touch the infection. A yeast infection isn’t as big of a deal in an adult, but in a micro-preemie it is huge, because it can enter the blood stream and pollute the entire body. Which it did with Julia. I feel like swearing off yeast for a long time. I guess I’ll stick with tortillas and unleavened bread. If you have ever seen what a little sugar will do to growing yeast, you can only imagine what it did to poor Julia. I’ve learned more than I ever thought I would about preemie babies and the delicate balance that is required for their survival. If you have ever met a 23 week baby that has survived, know that is one of God’s amazing miracles!!!!
Julia’s little life has touched me so deeply, she has truly left her little mark on the world. Thank you for letting us share our tender experience with you all. We love you!
God bless you all!
Julia Dawn Hansen, infant daughter of William Dredge Hansen and Erin Dawn Hartvigsen, died Friday, February 25, 2011. Graveside services will be held Saturday, February 26, 2011, 2:00 p.m. at Myers Evergreen Memorial Park, 100 Monroe Blvd., Ogden. Services under the direction of Myers Mortuary of Ogden.